Friday, August 26, 2011

Origin of Optimus

Roger wrote a piece for the Chicago Sun Times on The Origin of Transformers. It makes quite the argument for Intelligent Design.

"I raise the subject of Creationism because it opens the door to Intelligent Design, which I will require to explain the existence of Autobots. Do you know what an Autobot looks like? At first appearance they're mild-mannered motor vehicles. They are suddenly capable of unfolding and expanding into gigantic humanoid robots whose size seems optional, since sometimes they can bend over and look a human in the eye, and at other times they are hundreds of feet tall. One might wonder how they pack so much metallic mass into an area the size of a Camaro, and well one might."

"I will avoid the obvious question: How did the inhabitants of Cybertron learn of modern human automobile designs? Since they are capable of such quick morphing, they obviously evolved their auto disguises as a tactic to move unnoticed among humans, and travel around at will. I assume they need gasoline as lifeblood, which explains their interest in the Middle East earlier in the story. Their decision to attack Chicago seems inexplicable, until you take into consideration the generous tax credits offered by the Illinois Film Office."

And best of all:

"If you consider a Camaro, for example, wouldn't it obviously have had a Designer? Could its parts have been assembled by a hurricane (or a trillion hurricanes) blowing through a junkyard?
Certainly not. Therefore, this is proof that Autobots were not assembled on Cybertron by hurricanes or any other means envisioned by Darwin, and were Intelligently Designed. That makes the Transformers series a compelling parable for ID, and I expect several of this year's Republican presidential candidates to recommend the movies on that basis alone."

Brilliant quick read. And I liked the movie. Shuddup.

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